Curling to Statehood

Every once in a while, some disenfranchised DC resident will come up with a creative way to promote the cause of statehood for the District. How about forming their own Olympic team? Inspired by Puerto Rico's upset of the United States basketball team in the 2004 Olympics, a group of DC residents has organized a District curling team and have begun the process of seeking admission to the Games via the International Olympic Committee. I'm not kidding. The logic went like this:

When the guys hanging out at the Adams Mill Bar in Adams Morgan got over the initial embarrassment of that loss, somebody raised the question: Why exactly does Puerto Rico have an Olympic team?

Turns out Guam, American Samoa and the U.S. Virgin Islands also have Olympic teams despite being territories of the United States. All of those places are represented in Congress by a non-voting delegate. Just like . . . the District of Columbia, which doesn't have an Olympic team.

Yet.

It should be pointed out that, at the very least, Puerto Rico also has its own national soccer team and has competed in World Cup qualifiers (the were ousted by Aruba in qualifications for the 2002 Cup), as have the US Virgin Islands and American Samoa (who lost their four matches in the most recent round of Oceania qualifying by a combined 34-1). So If DC wants to start a soccer team, I may be persuaded to relocate to play goal. I've never been capped by the US, so that's not a problem.

Of course, if the curling thing doesn't work, there's always beer:

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer
- Frank Zappa